{"id":124191,"date":"2025-05-08T10:55:45","date_gmt":"2025-05-08T07:55:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/?p=124191"},"modified":"2025-05-08T10:55:48","modified_gmt":"2025-05-08T07:55:48","slug":"haz-de-necaz-707","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/?p=124191","title":{"rendered":"Haz de necaz"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><strong> Un \u015fofer gonea cu 200km\/h.<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0Vede girofarul unei ma\u015fini de poli\u0163ie \u015fi accelereaz\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Vede c\u0103 nu poate sc\u0103pa de poli\u0163ist a\u015fa c\u0103 trage pe dreapta.<br>Poli\u0163istul \u00eei spune c\u0103 a avut o zi grea dar i-a placut urm\u0103rirea, s\u0103-i spuna o scuz\u0103 buna \u015fi \u00eel va l\u0103sa s\u0103 plece.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>B\u0103rbatul: &#8211; Acum trei s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2ni so\u0163ia mea a fugit cu un poli\u0163ist, c\u00e2nd te-am v\u0103zut \u00een spate am crezut c\u0103 vrei s\u0103 mi-o aduci \u00eenapoi<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong> Cum e s\u0103 conduci cu soacra \u015fi nevasta<\/strong><br>Zilele trecute am dus-o pe soacra-mea acas\u0103 la \u0163ar\u0103. St\u0103tuse la noi de S\u0103rbatori. Nevast\u0103-mea \u00een dreapta, soacr\u0103-mea \u00een spate. M-au tocat, c\u00e2nd una, c\u00e2nd alta: vezi c\u0103 mergi cu vitez\u0103, las-o mai usor, nu dep\u0103si, dep\u0103\u015fe\u015fte etc. Evident c\u0103 mi-am ie\u015fit din min\u0163i. M-am \u00eentors spre nevasta-mea si i-am strigat furios:<br>&#8211; B\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103, cine conduce ma\u015fina asta, tu sau maic\u0103-ta?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong> Un \u015fofer, preot, este tras pe dreapta de Poli\u0163ie.\u00a0<\/strong><br>&#8211; Ce ai \u00een sticl\u0103?<br>&#8211; Ap\u0103.<br>Poli\u0163istul verific\u0103 con\u0163inutul sticlei.<br>&#8211; P\u0103rinte, dar aici este vin!<br>&#8211; Binecuv\u00e2ntat fie Bunul Dumnezeu \u015fi miracolele sale&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong> &#8211; Buna ziua, agent Ion Vasile! Actele la control, va rog!<\/strong><br>-Pofti\u0163i actele, domnule politist&#8230;de ce m-ati oprit?<br>-Conducea\u0163i haotic, permisul unde e?<br>-Permisul nu il am la mine&#8230;<br>-Dar unde il ave\u0163i?<br>-I l-am imprumutat ieri unui coleg de-al dumneavoastra pentru trei luni&#8230;<br>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong> &#8211; Ce automobil frumos!<\/strong>\u00a0E al dumneavoastra?<br>&#8211; Oarecum.<br>&#8211; Nu inteleg.<br>&#8211; Cand automobilul este curat \u015fi in stare perfecta de functionare \u00eel foloseste so\u0163ia mea. E o serat\u0103 undeva, ma\u015fina o ia fiica mea. \u00cen zi de meci, devine proprietatea fiului meu.<br>&#8211; Totu\u015fi, cand este a dumneavoastr\u0103?<br>&#8211; C\u00e2nd trebuie dus\u0103 la reparat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong> De unde \u015ftie femeia c\u0103 ma\u015fina are ap\u0103 la motor<\/strong><br>Dragul meu, cred c\u0103 ma\u015fina noastr\u0103 are ap\u0103 \u00een motor!<br>&#8211; Draga mea, tu m\u0103car \u015ftii unde este motorul?<br>&#8211; Da, \u00een ma\u015fin\u0103.<br>&#8211; \u015ei ma\u015fina unde e?<br>&#8211; \u00cen lac!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sursa:adevarul<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Un \u015fofer gonea cu 200km\/h.\u00a0\u00a0Vede girofarul unei ma\u015fini de poli\u0163ie \u015fi accelereaz\u0103. Vede c\u0103 nu poate sc\u0103pa de poli\u0163ist a\u015fa<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[83],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-124191","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-rubrica-de-umor"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p61naM-wj5","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124191","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=124191"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124191\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":124192,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/124191\/revisions\/124192"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=124191"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=124191"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=124191"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}