Pe internet circul\u0103 nenum\u0103rate bancuri care au \u00een prim-plan \u00eendr\u0103gosti\u0163ii. Iat\u0103 aici o selec\u0163ie a celor mai amuzante glume.<\/p>\n
1. Cum se preg\u0103tesc femeile pentru ziua de Sf\u00e2ntul Valentin?<\/p>\n
Cump\u0103r\u0103 felicit\u0103ri parfumate, caut\u0103 trei zile cadoul potrivit, merg la coafor, merg la cosmetic\u0103, \u00ee\u015fi cump\u0103r\u0103 haine \u015fi pantofi noi, se dau cu creme \u015fi se machiaz\u0103 o jum\u0103tate de zi, \u00ee\u015fi fac planuri \u015fi speran\u0163e.<\/p>\n
Dar b\u0103rba\u0163ii? Cump\u0103r\u0103 o floare de la flor\u0103ria din drum, o cutie de prezervative \u015fi eventual fac un du\u015f de cinci minute.<\/p>\n
2. De Ziua \u00cendr\u0103gosti\u0163ilor, b\u0103rbatul vine acas\u0103 cu un buchet mare, mare de flori.<\/p>\n
Nevasta \u00eel ia nervoas\u0103 din m\u00e2na lui \u015fi se pl\u00e2nge:<\/p>\n
\u2013 Grozav, acum trebuie s\u0103 m\u0103 simt \u015fi eu s\u0103 m\u0103 pun \u00een pat \u015fi stau cu picioarele desf\u0103cute, nu?<\/p>\n
El \u00eei r\u0103spunde mirat:<\/p>\n
-P\u0103i nu mai avem nici o vaz\u0103 \u00een cas\u0103 unde s\u0103 arunci florile?<\/p>\n
3. Doi logodnici viziteaz\u0103 un apartament proasp\u0103t finisat, pe care ar dori s\u0103-l cumpere.<\/p>\n
\u2013 Sunt bine g\u00e2ndite dulapurile astea \u00een perete, remarc\u0103 b\u0103rbatul.<\/p>\n
\u2013 Da, dragule, \u015fi extrem, extrem de \u00eenc\u0103p\u0103toare.<\/p>\n
\u2013 Scuza\u0163i, intervine agentul imobiliar, dar nu-s dulapuri, sunt chiar camerele!<\/p>\n
4. \u2013 Iubitule, m\u0103 la\u015fi s\u0103 m\u0103 uit la tine \u00een telefon?<\/p>\n
\u2013 Desigur! Dar mai \u00eent\u00e2i vreau s\u0103-mi dai o \u00eembr\u0103\u0163i\u015fare.<\/p>\n
\u2013 De ce?<\/p>\n
\u2013 Pentru c\u0103-mi vei lipsi mult<\/p>\n
5. \u2013 Iubitule, m\u0103 iube\u015fti?<\/p>\n
\u2013 Desigur!<\/p>\n
\u2013 Demonstreaz\u0103-mi!<\/p>\n
\u2013 Ce ai vrea s\u0103 fac?<\/p>\n
\u2013 Nu \u015ftiu, lupt\u0103-te cu un leu!?<\/p>\n
\u2013 Ce t\u00e2mpenii zici acolo, nu vreau s\u0103 mor, cere-mi altceva\u2026<\/p>\n
\u2013 Ok, atunci vreau parola ta de facebook. \u2013 Hmm, ia arat\u0103-mi o poza cu leul, sa v\u0103d c\u00e2t de mare e?<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
6.\u00a0Intre indragostiti:
\n-Draga mea, cateodata as vrea sa te sun numai ca sa iti aud vocea si sa iti spun ca te iubesc!
\n-Si de ce nu o faci?
\n-O voce ma impiedica!
\n-Pai ce spune vocea aia?
\n-\u201eCreditul dumneavoastra este insuficient pentru a initia acest apel!\u201d<\/p>\n
Sursa: libertatea.ro<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Pe internet circul\u0103 nenum\u0103rate bancuri care au \u00een prim-plan \u00eendr\u0103gosti\u0163ii. Iat\u0103 aici o selec\u0163ie a celor mai amuzante glume. 1.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":32462,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":""},"categories":[52],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-32461","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-amuzament"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i2.wp.com\/realitatearutiera.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/bancuri-ziua-indragostitilor-valentine-s-day.jpg?fit=1160%2C600&ssl=1","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p61naM-8rz","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32461","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=32461"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32461\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32463,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32461\/revisions\/32463"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/32462"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=32461"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=32461"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/realitatearutiera.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=32461"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}